So, in a way that is good news, but the next step is chromosome testing (karyotyping) for Joe and I. And that scares the crap out of me because if they do find something wrong there, there is basically nothing that they can do, they just will be able to tell us "Well, this is the abnormality that we have found and so now you know that you have X% chance of having a healthy pregnancy". So, if there really is something wrong, I would much rather have something like the clotting disorder, or some sort of imbalance that they could at least fix.
So we scheduled the tests for the beginning of Februrary, and I had a long talk with my doctor about where this all leaves us, and whether or not we still want to put TTC on hold while we schedule these tests and wait for the results. She told me that at this point, there is really no reason to wait since there is not really "treatment" for chromosome abnornalities anyways. I have a pretty good feeling that these tests are not going to find anything, but even if they did, I just really can not imagine that anything that they could tell me would make me stop trying to have another baby. They could tell me that I have a 1 in 1,000 chance of having another m/c or a 1 in 2 chance of it happening again and I think that I would still want to keep trying. I know that my body is capable of a healthy, full-term pregnancy, and Joe and I both feel very strongly that we are definitely not at the point where we are going to stop trying.
So, I guess we have the official "green light", or "go ahead" to start trying again. I wish I could be excited about it, but honestly I'm just terrified. With all that we have gone through, I don't think it will even really be exciting when I get a +HPT. More than anything, I will just be scared. And that just sucks. Trying to have a baby should be one of the most exciting times of my life and instead it is just terrifying. I hate that.
But... on a positive note, my doctor has decided to take a proactive approach to treatment from this poing forward, and so she has started me on baby aspirin and extra folic acid. Although there is nothing in my test results to suggest that I need them, she said that it can't hurt and just might do some good. So, in a small way that makes me feel a little better. At least there is something that I can do. Here's hoping that it makes a difference!
1 comment:
You probably are already doing this, but you should make sure that your doctor is testing your progesterone both during your LP (at minimum on 7DPO, but testing starting 3DPO and going every other day through 11DPO would give you even more information on your need for supplemental progesterone) and as soon as you get a +HPT.
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